Comments on: The Parenting Book That Changed How I Parent: Part 1

By: Ali Maffucci

Ali Maffucci — Mon, 10 Jul 2023 18:38:25 +0000

In reply to Lucy. Great question! As I mentioned in the post, I don't particularly find the "bring your kid to work with you" bit very applicable. Between work and my other two children and the lack of any family help around (the author points out that these cultures have lots of family help around, so that the mother isn't as ever present as it is today in the US) it's not possible for me to do that. Instead, I make sure that when I am with them during the day but primarily the morning and afternoons, I make sure to include them. They're actually extremely helpful, and I love encouraging that! Hope this answers.

By: Lucy

Lucy — Sun, 09 Jul 2023 03:32:32 +0000

Hi Ali, I also love this book. Curious re why you don’t follow the approach with the twins – ie have that at home with you whilst you work instead of out with a nanny where they are “100% child centric”?

By: Meg

Meg — Fri, 07 Jul 2023 15:00:37 +0000

Ali, curious how you introduced this to Lu and your nanny so you can all get on the same page. Did they read the book? Did you explain your takeaways? Was it easy for them to get on board and to implement the new techniques? Did Lu also agree right away to taking them out of after school activities? Thanks!

By: Alisa

Alisa — Thu, 06 Jul 2023 20:50:11 +0000

I loved the book when I read it a couple years ago, but this was a great refresher. Thanks! I wonder about older kids and how to approach things like screens, phones, social media, etc.

By: Claudia Jean

Claudia Jean — Thu, 06 Jul 2023 18:10:29 +0000

1) just listened to the book and loved it, surprisingly I already follow a lot of the tactics but I’m still having some trouble with tantrums here and there. my daughter is 2 years 4 months and in the book it was hard to understand what tactics work with what age groups so can you talk more about that 2-3 age range?
2) screen time is never mentioned on the book, thoughts on that? do we limit it? do we “let the kid do what they want”? how do I handle my daughter constantly want to use my phone for youtube

By: Alex

Alex — Thu, 06 Jul 2023 14:32:48 +0000

I’m intrigued by this book, but haven’t read it yet (I’m on a wait list for it from the library lol). I have an almost 6yo and 3yo. The 3yo has full rage meltdowns that can last for quite awhile and I’m wondering what other tactics might work? We’ve tried the “scripty” responses and validating feelings and all that, but I feel awful it takes her so long to get back to homeostasis. You can see when the release happens. It’s like a switch flips. Need more tactics to get the switch to flip sooner. Thank you!

By: Dana

Dana — Thu, 06 Jul 2023 02:50:26 +0000

I really enjoyed the book. It was extremely relatable with attainable strategies to adopt. I find that I lean in to the guidance immediately after reading, but tend to “lapse” as time goes on. Since writing the book, what guidance/strategies have stuck most for you as a parent?

By: Sarah T

Sarah T — Thu, 06 Jul 2023 02:36:01 +0000

Hi! I’m reading this book too based on your rec. question for the author:
– Do we think this works with neurodivergent kids?
– Our OT suggested specific praise/narration consistently to build self worth in the child. I worry your books strategy will erode self worth /confidence by no verbal affirmation and the slightly negative insinuation he’s a “baby” by not helping
– Ideas for when you truly HAVE to do something?

Thanks 🙂

By: Keriannr Skobo-Trought

Keriannr Skobo-Trought — Wed, 05 Jul 2023 20:24:08 +0000

I am interested, how this would be different for only children than for those with siblings. I imagine that there may still be some need for only children to have some child centric activities for socialization with their peers and play skills. I have a five-year-old only child, and he asks for a friend or another kid to play with often if it has been sometime since the last play date or kid outing.

By: Christa

Christa — Wed, 05 Jul 2023 17:22:28 +0000

Hi Michaeleen!

I recently finished your book and got so much value from it as a parent of two children ages 2 and 4. Thank you so much for your work. One part that I found tricky to grapple with was your suggestion to remove (most) toys from the home. I am an early childhood educator, and believe that “play is the work of childhood.” I’m pretty thoughtful about what comes into our home, so wondered what your perspective is on play?