My Beauty Journey After Completing my Family

My Beauty Journey After Completing my Family

Sharing my beauty journey after completing our family. Okay, I jokingly tell my friends and...

Sharing my beauty journey after completing our family.

Okay, I jokingly tell my friends and family that I’m in my “mommy makeover” stage of life, but I really do hate that term. The day I got pregnant I became an entirely different person and I don’t want a makeover from that, I want to live this life and I’m proud of my body for what it did (literally birthing 4 children and nursing them exclusively for 14+ months each child!)

Now, I’ll be real honest here. That doesn’t mean that I look at this body and am like, “I love it!” every day. Some days, I wish my lips were fuller or the veins on the side of my leg weren’t so obvious. We all have those days and honestly, it’s only natural. We’re comparative creatures by nature and pair that with social media (and then pair that with being a social media persona), well… you get it.

I’m not trying to excuse any of the information I share with you after this intro, but I want to give a little context as to why I’m sharing all of this. I really believe in sharing the journey and the now. I want to let you know what I’m doing so you don’t compare yourself to me without knowing the true story. But most importantly, if you also have a similar insecurity or concern, you now have a ‘friend’ who is going through it and may have a solution!

At the end of the day, you are the only one who has to live in your skin. It’s the same with anything in life when you receive unsolicited advice or judgment – brush it off your shoulder because you are the only one who knows the truth and you are the only one living your life. If a family member or friend judges you for addressing a personal physical insecurity of yours, just remember that.

Okay, now that we’re through all of that, let’s go to it!

Why Now?

Up until now, I haven’t really invested much time or money into improving my appearance because I wasn’t done building my family and with every pregnancy and birth, everything changes. I didn’t want to go through all of this time and money and then have to do it all over again (and of course, some treatments and procedures aren’t even possible when you’re pregnant or breastfeeding.)

Sure, I used to get lash extensions at one point to address my pin-straight, short lashes. And of course, I did Invisalign (which I think improved my appearance and addressed some of my physical insecurities by 80%!) Aside from that, I had never gotten injectables or really looked into addressing some of my skin insecurities.

Now that I am done having kids and our family is complete, I want to have fun with all the beauty and anti-aging treatments that are now available so I can look and feel my best and move forward. My body is finally mine again!

My “Refinements” List

One night, years ago, after a couple glasses of wine, I made a list that I dubbed “Refinements.” These were all the things I wanted to do or “get done” to feel my best. Here’s the list and how it’s going:

Done

  • Zoom whitening for teeth
  • Dyeing my hair (balayage)
  • Eyelash perm for curling eyelashes (lasts 4-6 weeks)
  • Intimate lightening: this is a chemical peel for your lady parts to lighten up your bikini line and more private areas.
  • Invisalign to straighten my teeth and correct a crossbite
  • Botox for wrinkles: for my 11s in between my eyes, evening out my wonky eyebrows, and forehead wrinkles.

Going Through It Now

  • Vein removal via sclerotherapy: I have reticular veins (a step above spider veins) on my legs from pregnancy.

Scheduled

  • Microblading for the eyebrows: the hair on my eyebrows stopped growing (I barely pluck!) and I want some more fullness towards the ends and to fill in little gaps.

Need/Want to Schedule

  • Fraxel: this is a laser treatment that improves tone, texture, and radiance for aging skin (or if you have scars/sun damage.) I want to do this for the lines around my mouth and also a few sun spots from years of tanning without sunscreen!
  • Laser hair removal: I’d love to do my bikini line and armpits!
  • Botox for lip flip: I’m really considering this, but need to talk to my specialist more. Apparently this is a subtle way to add a little volume to your upper lip without filler and my lips do curl up when I smile so I am a candidate.

On Loving My Body

And that’s the list! I’m going to follow up with blog posts as I complete the list! By no means is this meant to suggest that you need to ‘build’ a list like this or get treatments done. I’m just sharing what I’m working towards, in case some of you are also struggling with insecurities from a post-baby body! It’s a total mind whirlwind being pregnant and having kids – your body completely changes.

I love what my body did for me and I’ll be forever grateful for it, but that doesn’t mean I have to accept it exactly as it is – I can want to look better so I can feel more confident. It’s also 2023 and we can look a few years younger thanks to modern medicine and science.

I also think that moms tend to age more rapidly due to the stress on our bodies and every day! My biggest pet peeve is when moms are shamed for wanting to change their post-baby bodies! No shame whether you want to change or don’t. All bodies are beautiful and YOU are the only one living in your body!

I certainly think it’s important to be in a place where you love your body before making changes to it. I’ve done that work, I love my body, and now I Just want to *enhance* it!

I’d love to hear about any beauty procedures or treatments that have boosted your confidence and made you look and feel your best! 

with love, Ali

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comments

  • Love this! Thanks for being real!
  • Love following your journey. I am 43yo and feel the same way - now that my body is my own, its time for some "improvements". I did Laser on underarm, lip, bikini and leg. I am happiest with the underarm, bc I have dark hair. Apparently it works best for dark hair. No more shaving as really been a game changer for me, so much time saved in the shower. I also recently tried botox, on just my forehead. I was so scared, but it was painless and easy, I am happy with the results. Keep sharing!
    • This is all great info, Jenn! Thank YOU for being so open to sharing with us. Love that we're all in this together!
  • I had laser hair removal starting with my underarms. Liked that so much I did my entire legs and into the bikini line BEST thing I ever spent money on!!! You will be so happy you did it
  • Love this! I got laser hair removal in my 20s (as soon as I could afford it!) and it was the best! I still don’t have to shave and I love it mainly bc I was starting to get a lot of rashes from shaving. I also got Invisalign and again loved it! I will also disclose I don’t have kids but still related to loving your body and still making refinements. Love you Ali!
    • This is all so great to hear! Thank you for sharing!
  • Thanks so much for sharing. I’m in my “mommy makeover stage now myself” it’s comforting knowing I’m not the only one. I appreciate my bodies, my babies and my family but I have completely lost myself and looking forward to building back up my self esteem :)
    • It's so amazing to be able to share all of this together! Here's to finding ourselves again! So, so important! You're awesome, Jamie!
  • Hi! I had the lip flip as I too would love a fuller lip but was not ready to commit to the filler and was totally afraid of "duck lips"....the first time I did the lip flip I did a full amount and I was not prepared(meaning no one told me) that you basically can't purse your lips. So think spitting your toothpaste out, drinking from a straw....all feels odd! But, I liked the little subtle fullness it provided. I did it again and this time used a half dose of botox. It worked just as well but with much less "paralysis". Talk to your provider about this as an option to get used to the look and the feel. If it is not bad you could likely go back and complete the other half of the dose. I am all for doing whatever it takes(within reason) to feel amazing in the skin you live in. Everything you are doing is mild in comparison to what is available. You go girl!!
    • Tracey! Thank you for sharing these details with us about your experience. We're sure this will be so helpful to everyone in our community who's also curious!! You're awesome.
  • I have done the lip flip many times and love it! It’s such a subtle way to give your upper lip a little more volume and pout. Lip filler has always scared me. I’m afraid of looking unnatural. But that tiny bit of Botox does just enough and I think I am probably the only one who notices but that’s the way I prefer it!
    • This is great to hear, Rhonda! Thank you for sharing with all of us!
  • Thank you for sharing these treatments with us! I love calling them "refinements" and am totally going to steal that word. While I'm not yet a mother, I am in my mid-30s and am struggling with seeing my face and body change, and regular refinements make me feel so much better and more confident. I heard a podcast before mention that there is nothing "natural" about bleaching our hair or putting gel on our nails, and the majority of women do that, so why should we treat Botox and lasers any differently and shame them? It really made me think differently and embrace them more. Appreciate you! xo
    • Yes! We can define everything on our own terms. It's so important!
  • HI Ali I’m curiously about sclerotherapy. I need it but have always been too fearful to have it done. Would love some follow-up info from you. Thanks.
    • Definitely! Ali also documents the procedures over on her instagram! You might love seeing it & hearing from her there if you haven't already! instagram.com/alimaffucci
  • Hi! I have been following you for years and am very grateful you are being honest and straightforward with everything you do. I haven't given birth, but since turning 40 (I am now almost 42) I also started looking into some of the treatments. I have done laser hair removal, because I have been waxing for years and I only had a few hairs growing anyway, so now I have gotten rid of those as well 😂. I loved it, so I do believe you will as well. As far as other treatments though... I have spoken with several plastic surgeons and cosmeticians, and I decided that botox, fillers, and other stuff for me are a no-go, because there isn't any 100% certainty that after (or if) I decide to stop, my lips, forehead, etc. will be as they were beforehand. Of course...this is only my opinion, everyone is entitled to theirs, so no judgment or whatever. I will follow along and am looking forward to learning about everything you go though.
    • Maja! Thank you so much for sharing your honest opinion. It's refreshing to be able to hear an alternative view without feeling judged. You're a really amazing asset to this community. Please keep in touch!
  • I LOVE this! I have a 4 and 5 year old (Irish twins) and up until this last year I felt guilty doing anything to make myself look/feel good because honestly society and in my case even some close family members make it seem like If your not just home with your kids doing absolutely anything and everything for them all day your a bad mom. the biggest thing I did for myself this past year was get porcelain crowns put on all my teeth. I’ve always hated my smile and with the crowns they were able to fix the ones I had that were damaged and crooked and make my smile look better which makes me feel more confident not just as a mom but as a wife too! I’ve also gone to the dermatologist a few times for advice on how to help my skin look and feel good, have laser hair removal scheduled next month, and eventually want to get a BBL facial to remove some sun damage I have on my face.
    • Love that you shared this with us, Alyssa! Thank you!
  • I'd love to see you on Youtube sharing your wellness routines, style inspo, and day-to-day lifestyle. I remember watching your vlogs years ago on Inspiralized and enjoyed that aspect of your channel. Great blog!